One of the hardest things to do no matter what is going on in our lives is opening up and expressing our feelings.
For some reason we seem to find it the hardest to open up to those who care for us the most: family, loved ones, and friends. We have this crazy fear of being judged and looked down on. When someone truly cares for us they won’t ever judge us or make fun of how we feel. If they do it is time to re-evaluate who we surround ourselves with. However, we have no problem opening up to strangers and telling them all about our lives and what’s bugging us…
Why do we do this? Why are we so brave when telling our problems to a stranger? When speaking to a stranger we don’t think of them judging us or telling us that we’re crazy. This might be because we know we’ll probably never see them again, and want that great feeling that comes from getting whatever is bugging us out of our system. Most of the time whoever we’re speaking with usually opens up and tells us about their crazy life, as well!
Why do we fear telling the people closest to us what is going on in our lives? Why are we afraid of being judged? Why do we care more than we should about the micro-problems?
Remember the last time you told someone what was bothering you? Think about how good that felt! Think about the weight that was lifted off your shoulders. Why wouldn’t we want to do this more often?
I have never personally been good at expressing myself-in any way. I would keep all of my emotions inside. Whether I was feeling shitty or not, I would always tell people I was great! Was I really that great? 75% of the time yes, but the other 25%-heck no! We all have days where we feel down, feel like the world is against us and no one gives a shit about us. Guess what, that’s life!
Something that I have learned is that if you have to try to be happy, you will never be happy. Denying negative emotions leads to deeper and more prolonged negative emotions and dysfunction. If you are someone who thinks money will make you happy, that isn’t the case either. If you aren’t happy when you’re broke, you won’t be happy when you’re rich.
I used to let my emotions build up inside of me for so long that I would lose energy and get incredibly mad at the meaningless small things! One of the best things that I have done for myself mentally is starting to learn how to express myself and tell people how I honestly feel.
What will really help to improve our mental state is expressing ourselves, communicating with those that care for us, and stop pretending we’re happy!